Remote Controls and Robots
by CriminallyCecy
Summary: A late post for the May Future Fic Challenge; Rossi can't cope with Strauss' technologically advanced and confusing computerized household.


**Hello All! This was written for May's "Future Fic" challenge on "Chit Chat on Author's Corner" :) I chose Rossi and was paired with Erin. Not my favorite pairing, but I can see how it makes sense. **

**Apparently I FORGOT TO POST it in May, mental me. Just found it in my docs… sigh.**

**One shot! Hope you enjoy :):):) **

"Fucking thing... I swear to God..." David Rossi growled in his kitchen as he gave the new refrigerator his famous Rossi Death Glare.

"ERIN! FOR GODS SAKE HOW DO YOU GET ICE AND WATER OUT OF THIS CONTRAPTION?" Rossi yelled up the stairs.

Erin Strauss stretched languorously under the Egyptian cotton sheets in her huge bed and rolled her eyes at the man downstairs. My, if he didn't have the skill of the Gods in bed but he couldn't figure out an Ice Water function on a refrigerator.

Smiling vaguely and taking her time with a black satin robe, she replayed the erotic moments of the previous evenings in her head. David's dark, burning hot skin against hers, his somehow soft yet firm lips, branding kisses all over her legs, tummy, neck, and breasts. He was a downright God, in bed, She thought.

Gracefully floating down the stairs it took all of her not to bust out laughing at the downright ornery look on David's face, lips twitching ominously.

"David. I showed you last night, use this remote control." Erin swyped lightly on the iPod sized, touch screen remote, maneuvered a few red dots and placed a cup under the dispenser. David's eyes widened and then narrowed dangerously at the piece of glass she set carefully on the counter that looked less like a remote control than anything he had ever seen in his life.

"I was preoccupied last night, cara." David wrapped his arms around her torso from behind and kissed the deliciously sensitive spot under her ear, relishing her small squeal as his goatee tickled her. "And I think you should start coming to my place, I can't keep up with all this new technology, you seem to have something new installed every week." Erin rolled her eyes again as she handed him the full cup of Iced water.

"David, technology could make your life a lot easier if you'd let it."

"Can't teach an old dog new tricks, babe. I'm in the sunset years, if I have to waste what precious few days I might have left learning how to link my washing machine to my wifi connection, I'm going to go postal."

"You're incorrigible." Erin leaned onto his back, allowing him access to her neck.

"And you're delicious. But seriously. A remote control for the refrigerator? What's next, Erin?"

"I was thinking about a temperature controlled bathtub…"

Rossi groaned and pulled away from the tasty and complicated vixen, throwing up his hands. "This is actually becoming an issue. I can't navigate a time travel space house! I'm putting my foot down, you're coming to my place from now on." David crossed his arms over his chest.

"And forgo my luxuries? Tsk, tsk, David Rossi you're negotiating skills are really devolving. I'm not going to stay with you in that ancient old wood house you call a cabin resort. It's just not happening."

"Well if you didn't need your hard boiled egg at 170 degree's every morning then chilled for approximately 17 minutes in a special lab compartment in your ice box, it wouldn't matter if we lived in a tent! Jesus, woman, have you even forgotten how to dress yourself?"

As his heated words rose in volume, so did one of Erin's eyebrows at the audacity of this man. Well, apparently he'd forgotten who he was sleeping with. HIS BOSS. "David, you may lower your voice and blood pressure right now or you may put some pants on your oversized ego and march right out to whatever backwoods establishment you call home, you Neanderthal!"

"Fine. I will. And I'll catch my dinner on a hook tonight too, not ask my robot stove to make it for me. Fresh, slimy and wriggling on a hook!" He said the last words near her face, and Erin shuddered at the barbarism.

"You're an animal!" She called after him as he ran upstairs to find his clothing. "An ancient, outdated, fucking animal!"

Thumping sounds coming fast down the stairs told her he'd found his clothing and was now headed back downstairs, quick.

"ANCIENT?"

"ANCIENT! YOU HEARD ME. Get with the times, David Rossi! Is anyone from your generation even alive, do you think?" sipping her drink she smirked as she saw the tell-tale sign of a blood vessel in his forehead turn purple and start to pulse dangerously.

"I think you said something very different only hours ago, you cranky ice queen. In fact I think you said.."

"Shut up and go home, David." Pursing her lips against the memory of his taste on her lips, still to flustered and stubborn to give in, Erin put on her best _fuck off _look.

"Fine. Fine." Throwing up his hands and letting his shirt stay unbuttoned in a rebellious and wanton way, he continued to antagonize her. "Don't call me when your freak robot starts a home revolution and all the appliances unite against you."

"It's a central home monitoring system, you…. Pig-headed ASSHOLE!" Erin yelled as he slammed the door.

And while listening to the sounds of his government-issued SUV stir to life and peel out of the driveway, Erin sighed pathetically. "Herbert."

An automated voice revived through a vent in her wall. "Yes, ma'am?"

"Please initiate GPS in the Audi for Little Creek."

"Yes, ma'am." The robot voice replied.

~CM~~CM~~CM~

**Hope you enjoyed Sorry I posted late. Please review!**


End file.
